This page maintained by David Gerard.

Ladies and Gentlemen,

ARSCC(UK) Productions (Entertainment Division) are proud to present the first edition of the


ARSCC Crossword Puzzle

We hope these will become a common (if irregular) feature of the newsgroup. Normally our compilers would have more pressing tasks to perform; however, we believed it was a good idea to celebrate the imminent dissolution of the cult's evil leadership with a little game.

Normally these crosswords would be for entertainment purposes only. But, since this is the first edition, the ARSCC has been persuaded to hand out a little prize for the first correct entry posted to ARSCC-L.

First prize will be a lovingly restored copy of the NOTS material in it's entirety! Bound in plush red leather, with hand-crafted tooled gold on the spine, the retail value of these documents is beyond estimation. We hope that the recipient of this wonderful prize will be public spirited, and donate it to a major library so all of us can have the opportunity to enjoy LRH's words of wisdom.

So you will have a permanent reminder of your happy times here on a.r.s, you will also receive a bound and signed copy of the Fishman affidavit. It will be yours to keep and cherish forever.

But that's not all ...

Second prize is the actual underwear worn by LRH during his unsuccsessful attempt to avoid military service; although time has not been kind to this article -- the peanut butter stains are still clearly visible on the crotch and, on a label at the back, one can still faintly see the legend "L Ron Hubbard", written in his mother's own hand.

Our five lucky third prize winners will each receive a copy of Andrew Milne's recently published paperback The Biggest Lies I Ever Told on ARS: Volumes I to IV and a hardback copy of the 'hot off the presses' Volume V.

If you don't win anything, don't worry. ARSCC has already acquired 'first refusal' rights to a large amaount of cult paraphernalia in anticipation of their soon-to-be-announced closing down sale. People who submit a correctly filled crossword will be allowed into the sale rooms one hour before they officially open and will be allowed to make their purchases before the rest of the rabble are allowed access. You lucky people!

Put on your thinking caps, and have a go. It's FREE!

01 12 13   15
02   03   04 18
05           17  
06       14    
1,An engram so good they named it twice (5,5 also 7 down)
2,Heard a lot on #scientology after a succesful repair (2)
3,Needled into an End Of Cycle without a parachute. (2)
4,Tell Snow White she's been offloaded. (2)
5,Sounds like a variable angle of attack (7)
6,Subscribe to Biased Journalism (6)
7,In short, you can't have it both ways without being 1.1 (2)
8,An unethical habit shared by venomous snakes and ho's (8)
9,Initially (in the USA) an old gas station. They might return one day. (2)
10,A taxing problem for the cult with trade secrets. (3)
11,Come first, but pay for the privilege. (3)

6,This young dog knows a lot of old tricks. (6)
7,See 1 across. (5)
8,The Ho' does this for Clean Gene, so how come she's still there? (4)
12,He pinned his hopes on the Liberty Tree. (5)
13,Unlucky for some, an alternative temple in ars looks like it's ready. (3)
14,The Prince of barratry? No, but close enough for a rice farmer. (4)
15,It's plain to see that the Co$ are a con. (5)
16,The Co$ herald the age of money? I couldn't possibly comment without this UK publication. (2)
17,Is he a scieno's dream or nightmare?. It depends on who he really is. (7)
18,Why cut short group sex in cult shop?

This crossword and HTML document is ©1996 Permission to redistribute this article in any form is granted, as long as the author is correctly attributed.
The answers (not that you'll need them) will be posted to ars in due course. If you find any errors, please let me know as soon as possible and I will publish a corrected version.
[Entertainment for Clambakers]